For most of my life I have measured the passage of time by my calendar or daytimer. I focused on the next event, project, holiday or upcoming family birthday. As each one would pass, I would mark it off as accomplished or completed and move forward to prepare for the next one.
Growing older I realize, the timeline has become shorter, and I am more given to measure my time these days by the absence of lost opportunities to serve and encounter the presence of the Lord in my daily walk with Him. I long to be desperate in the desire of encountering God.
I long to be the desperate Mary of Matthew 26, bringing to Jesus the passionate alabaster box, breaking the fragrance of my brokenness at His feet. I long to abandon the crowd of voices in my head that try to steal my worship, withholding from God that which He longs for me to give. I desire to long only for His presence. As God bends over from heaven to hear the irresistible crackle and tinkle of the breaking of alabaster boxes, I long to be one of the hearts that He hears and sees.
I can only imagine that God's favorite fragrance is the fragrance of brokenness from His children. My heart longs to hear the voice of Jesus saying to me as I hear His footsteps approaching, "I can smell My favorite fragrance!"
I long to risk everything to gaze into His face, to hear His tender voice say to me again how he loves and forgives me, and how I long to express my complete devotion to Him in pure honesty and sincerity. For the child of God loving Him, must be worth far more than a lifetime's worth of wages or worldly gain, or anything else that would hold us back from lavishing on Him all that we have and all that we are.
Mary sacrificed by giving her costly fragrance to Jesus at the expense of being ridiculed by a room full of men who did not understand what was in her heart and why she wanted to do it. They were casting judgment by what was in their own hearts.
Only Jesus knew and understood what she was doing and the purpose for which she desired to do it. Mary was chasing after and found that which her heart longed to have. Worship.
Today sweet friend, if you never chase after God, you will never catch Him. Maybe it's time for you to change the way that you are measuring your time. Maybe you need to break your own alabaster box and lavish on Him the broken and tender heart that He longs for you to have in your approach for Him! Our earthly brokenness creates a heavenly openness. How desperate are you for God today?
Hold Fast
-Bren
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