YOU SANK MY BATTLESHIP

When it comes to marriage, God did not hand out a bill of rights to us, but a simple role description for both man and woman that entails each part or role that they are to live out. If done properly, their acts of obedience to what God requires of them will bring much happiness into their marriage as well as peace in their home. It would be ever so wise to understand what that role description requires before one signs on to such a great responsibility. But unfortunately, most people do not really understand what it will take to make a marriage work before they say, “I Do”. They simply want to be married and reap the rewards of that sacred institution.  God’s Word outlines for us what those requirements and responsibilities are. While there are many privileges of being married, those privileges should never be the focus of our individual responsibilities. The focus should be on obeying what God has commanded that we do and in having that perception, we reap the privileges that come with His blessings… and they are great!  Even non-Christians can benefit from God’s instructions if they are applied properly.  

I’ve seen through the years that when attending a class or teaching a class on marriage, people often times will tend to focus more on what the responsibility of their spouse is, rather than what they personally are exhorted to do. Sadly, after the class, they return home only to assume the former role that they had been living and nothing changes in their life, marriage or home. The next time a class is offered on marriage, they choose not to attend because they feel like they were never helped by the last one. The simple fact of the matter is: that one of them, or both for some reason or another was unable to hear what God was saying to them on a personal level, or they simple refused the council or advise they were given. Like playing a game, most people are more interested in “playing the game”, than learning the rules to guide them in their participation.  

Last week I was playing “You Sank My Battleship” with one of my grandsons. Since he had never played the game before I was trying to explain to him what the rules were. As we began playing, we were laughing and having fun. After a very short time he no longer wanted to play by the rules but wanted to do a little cheating on the side to advance his torpedoes and blow me out of the water. Upon my rebuking his cheating, he told me that, “it was only a game” and it was okay if he wanted to have two turns in a row, as well as taking a look at my layout, to determine where I had placed my battleships. Of course by doing that, he would know exactly what numbers to call out, to have a direct hit on my ships every time. Then having two turns to my one turn, he would quickly win the game. While I explained to him that “winners never cheat and cheaters never win”, and that if he was going to play by those rules, I did not want to play; he quickly assured me that he would do it right way the next game because he said; he loved me and wanted to sink some more of my battleships! I thought to myself upon hearing that, “I think he gets it” and gave a hearty chuckle!  You see marriage is kind of like playing “You Sank My Battleship”…it can start out just fine. Both people can be having a blast and then someone wants to cheat on the rules a little. Then one of them wants to change the rules and before you know it, they have blown the other one out of the water.

You see those people want to play the game to reap the benefits by winning the wrong way. In some marriages, people will allow themselves to be guided by the rewards instead of doing it the right way. In the end the rewards will be much greater, if they were accomplished by the proper means that it takes to win. Like my grandson, many people are willing, to stop cheating and play by the rules the right way, because they love whom they are playing with and while they may say something crazy like, “I love you and want to sink some more of your battle ships”, the fact of the matter is, they love whom they are in the marriage with, and are willing to go through the process the right way; once they understand that the way they were doing it was the wrong way!. When that happens, hope abounds and change is right around the corner. No matter how long you are married, always be willing to do things God’s way. For they truly will bring the most peace and joy in any situation.

Loving on you today,

Bren